I found out this week that the soon to be ex would like me to pay him half of value of our 2nd car, the car that I use. My car. I assure you, it is not a very valuable car - a small, economy vehicle. At first I was deeply disturbed by this request. It was just another "thing" in our life that I didn't lay claim too. On the surface, it appears that most of our "things" are not mine at all, but his. Paid for with his money. As a stay at home mom, I did not contribute in a measurable way. I didn't have a personal saving account, or my own credit card. I didn't buy gifts or household items with money I personally worked for. These things were basically on loan. This latest request for my car clearly reinforced the notion that I possessed little value in that previous life. I had not even earned my way towards a Honda Civic. This situation got me thinking this week...
All these "things" can be replaced. The car, the pots and pans, dishes and glasses, sofa, TV, etc.. They are just things. What is really of value to me right now which can not be taken from me are the new "things" I have discovered in myself and my life: wonderful people, intense passion and inner peace. When I really stop and think about what makes me feel the happiest, it is these things that top my list. Having confidence in myself to take the risk and get out there and be with people, to flaunt my passions, and to sit unworried about my future are the real things. The right things. The irreplaceable things.
So, car or no car, dishes, plates, Tivo, whatever it is that this divorce might take, it's the person I'm becoming with the life I'm living that can never ever be taken. I've got everything.
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